the President of Iran wrote me a letter
yes.
yes he can.
when I read the Fox News replies I blacked out.
I blacked out, and when I came to, I was down at this playground on Octotillo boulevard. that’s like, two miles from here.
I was lying on the blacktop. my head hurt, and there was a crowd standing over me. I started to get up, but I realized I was tangled in a basketball net, and a metal rim was seared into my hand. the metal backboard loomed over me, twisted into an unintellgible shape.
one of the many onlookers, stood there, mouth agape. “man, you just tomahawk jammed behind your back, and then ripped the hoop down with your free hand! holy fuck!”
that’s right. I read some reader-reply comments from dipshit Fox News constituents, and I blacked out, went into a superhuman sprint, somehow acquired a basketball, and dunked, hard, on some poor busters.
what a glorious afternoon.
thanks, Wonkette.
