rock over London. rock on, Chicago.

I got my furniture.
my family, saints, drove it out here and brought it to me. very nice of them.

so Uncle Bill wants his Mobile Web to work on his cell phone so we can find a Lowe’s, and he’s talking to a Verizon customer service woman on speaker phone and opening a can of tuna at the same time, and he can’t get his battery out to reset it. so he hands it to me.
“nephew, fix this.” this is yelled. not rudely, just at a high volume. cause everyone’s old and deaf and no one can hear each other.
so I take it, and I realized it’s completely covered in clear duct tape.
“Billy, what the fuck? why is there tape all over this?”
he looks at it and says, “my cell phone is water proof at three feet deep for 30 minutes. so if I wrap duct tape on it that makes it a helluva of a lot more water water proof.”
so he can’t get the battery open. cause he taped his phone shut. which explains why you can’t hear him when you call. it’s a ball of tape with noise coming out of it.

right now, he’s sitting right in front of me, talking about sneaking into Jimmy Carter’s inaugural ball with Joe Robinson, the guy who puts up dry wall in Hawaii.

this is the weekend.

I haven’t done this in a while.
tonight’s after work grocery list:

wheat bread, one loaf
Cheerios, one box
Wheat Thins
Pecan Sandies
ketchup
Kraft Singles, many, individually wrapped
pickles

but that’s not all.

other shit I have in the fridge:

the other day I bought a bag of cherries. and I’m trying to mow through them, but it turns out there’s a lot of cherries in the bag, man. I’m going soft.
Box Of Chicken Nuggets. frozen.
three Tecates.
couple of bottles of water.
also, I have a bag of baby carrots. which sucks, cause I don’t got no dip, man, to dip them in. eating straight carrots non stop really works on my jaw.

dip! god damn it, I knew I forgot something.

so I’m sitting here watching “Force 10 from Navarrone” in my underwear. checking my email.
I’ve never seen this movie before. apparently, it’s a sequel to the movie with Gregory Peck. only this one came out in the late 70s and it stars Carl Weathers, Harrison Ford and the hardest motherfucker on the planet, Robert Shaw.
so there was this scene, where the commandos are being taken out to hills to be shot by the Nazis, or some such bullshit. and the Nazi Bond girl who turns out to be a double agent who is guarding them, she shoots the soldiers and lets Han Solo and Shaw go.
and she’s all Russian-accent and stone-cold soldier, so she’s like, “hit me. do you expect me to go back there with my hair combed?”
so Harrison Ford hits her with this weak-wristed tap. cause, you know, he don’t want to hit a girl or nothing.
and she says, “hit me harder.”
and before she can even finish her sentence, Robert Shaw comes in from off camera and lays that bitch out.

I don’t want to give a resounding approval of battery, here, but that was a great scene. I didn’t see it coming. at all.

Matt’s 4th of July, in a series of short vignettes:

I need to restate how much I like “tumbling dice.” seriously. I don’t know why I never realized this before. amazing.

work was alright today. I finished well before deadline. so I got home. ate a grilled cheese sandwich. and now, I’m here, deciding if I’m hungry to go hunting for food at 2 am. probably not. probably will end at Waffle House, tired over my pancakes. get a hold of yourself, man.

I argued with Alisha about her math class. the entire class apparently failed her first exam, and she’s looking for a way out.
I don’t think she should. we differ. we argue. we yell. I hang up.
the next day, I’m mad, and upset that I argued with someone like that. because no one likes the feeling of arguing, unless they’re a closeted masochist, and that I’m not. but I’m also not sure if I’m sorry. and what I wish I had said, was “stop being such a fucking victim.” cause that’s what I really mean.

okay, “redline” by Fu Manchu is on. and god damn, it is rad. this goes in the “songs that make me think I’d make a great music video director” pile. as well as “Cyclone Launch.” this shit is unsettlingly heavy.

I’m reading about the USS Indianapolis. with the sharks and whatnot. jesus. know what spurred me on this? saw “Jaws” on TV up at dad’s house a few weeks ago. we all know who I’m talking about.

alright, now it’s “sweet virginia” by the Stones again. another good one. wow, I’m so happy with myself; I’ve got great taste!

huh. looks like Bill Clinton doesn’t like the Libby pardon. guess what, asshole, all of you let a couple of white collar criminals go ever four or eight years, depending on who’s donating to your Library or which defense firm contract is the largest. that Marc Rich guy was an evil piece of shit. moneygrubbing son of a bitch. I don’t understand why pardons are considered a presidential fucking privilege.

okay, the best thing I like about “tumbling dice” is the piano at the end. or Watts, drumming before his time. or the backup singers. I wish I had backup singers. for everything thing I said.

the worst thing about a blog is you can never say what you really mean.
everybody knows this, right?

I had cable and internet installed today.
jesus. what have I done?
I’m watching a show called “Cheaters.” and it’s blowing my mind. like a train wreck, that I can’t look away from.
okay. now it’s “Friday.” and it’s awesome.
seriously. this movie’s hilarious.

“what’s up, Stanley?”
Stanley waves him off.
“well fuck you then, punk!”
then they break into his house.

nothing much has been up. job is what it is.
what else.
I bought “exile on main street.” and it’s killer. seriously. “tumbling dice” raises goose bumps on my arm. which is pretty lame, but it’s true.

alright, the television is going to be a problem. it’s taken about fifteen minutes to type just this far, and everything I’ve watched has been awful. right now? infomercial for a Sleep Number bed, hosted by Actress Linsdsay Wagner. who I’ve never heard of. that’s the intern’s name at work, I think, but never heard of the actress.
I don’t even remember what program I was watching. maybe another commercial for “Natural Male Enhancement.”

alright, this is pointless. I can’t focus on shit. nothing to explain. just not tonight.