rock over London. rock on, Chicago.

it’s mostly mayonaisse.

it has been brought to my attention that “a lot of people” at Dagwood’s read the blog. Dagwood’s is where I worked so many months ago in college. it was fun. there wasn’t much to it; I ate my weight in sandwiches, drove around and listened to music and got tips. and ate sandwiches. perfect student job.

I know of two people who read up on this. one person’s name starts with L. the other, B. I think. but that’s all. if anyone else is out there, and would like to identify themselves with intials, feel free. I’ll literally spend anywhere between 20 minutes to an hour puzzling over them.

I did this once before, this shot-in-.the-dark who-reads-this kind of thing. a guy I know who was once, long ago in Chicago responded and Spencer pretended to be Paris Hilton.  after that stunning reaction, I shelved the interaction thing. but, here we are again. so holla back. or don’t, and prove Mar wrong. either way, this will still sound like a desperate cry for help. and that’s not keeping Mar up.

the Bears beat Green Bay for the second time this season. they were eliminated last week, and the next best thing from Chicago actually fielding a decent team is beating Green Bay twice.
and as is the case, Jay Mariotti wrote a column about how the victory doesn’t mean anything and that the Bears still suck.
all I have to say to that is “fuck you, killjoy. and please please please go cover another team.”

ok. and I’m going on vacation next week. so tomorrow, after work, I’m heading to dad’s house, and then back to Charlottesville on the 26th for another day of copy editing. and then I fly out, and it’s Chicago by way of Florida. so I’ll take lots of pictures. of course!

it has become somewhat of a tradition in the family that I write the chintzy, asshole Christmas letter that mom mails out once a year. which is fun, cause mom has a really good sense of humor about it, and I’m allowed to write just about whatever I want. within reason. of course.

its growing harder to write, as I really don’t know what’s going on with everyone on a daily basis anymore. I’m no longer a regular Valparaiso fixture, so a lot of the stuff I add about moms and grandma and my uncle is second hand. so their entries suffer a little. nevertheless, it’s still entertaining. enough that I’m preserving it here, in eternal WordPress memory. 

so, here it is, sans last names. got to make a halfhearted attempt at privacy, after all.

To all of our dear friends: Season’s greetings!

What a year of ups and downs it has been! So much has happened in our neck of the woods that it may be impossible to include it all in the confines of a holiday-time update. But rest assured, it won’t be for a lack of trying.

To begin on a somber note, August marked the loss of Aunt Nettie K, who went to the Lord just shy of 95. The house has grown emptier, if quieter, with her passing. But rather than grieve her death, we celebrated a full life, knowing she’s gone on to a better place.

Without skipping a beat – Valerie has been kept busy by the Merillville school system and its steady supply of special education students. She recently realized a lifelong dream of being the most popular coed on campus with her induction into Delta Kappa Gamma International, a teacher’s honor sorority. Val is finally a Delta Kap, and can’t wait for the first spring formal!

Meanwhile, Uncle Billy D has settled in across town on his lakefront property. He recently installed an above-ground pool, which immediately drew the envy of every neighbor on two blocks, and is a regular fixture on Northview Drive for Grandma Mary D’s many home-cooked meals.

Grandma Mary was sad to see sister Nettie go, but has stayed busy with the family nonetheless. She, Valerie and young Mary M found time in the closing days of summer to visit the Pacific Northwest for the annual Family Vacation. Grandma, who chooses to buck the rules as a matter of course, fed the animals inside Olympic National Park despite a brochure that specifically asked her not to. Take that, National Park Service!

And speaking of young Mary: She’s on the verge of college graduation and her first step into the void in May, and has had quite the year herself. She spent last spring studying abroad in Budapest, Hungary, and was able to travel to Dalmatia, Poland, and everywhere in between during only a few months. She took a lot of pictures and picked up a little Hungarian along the way, most of which she taught only to the dog upon her return. Big Mar then spent the summer on the placid lakes of Minnesota, acting as a canoe guide at a Boy Scout Camp. Girl power, Mar!

Matt M, on the other hand, kept most of his globetrotting stateside. He left his newspaper position in California for another editor’s desk in the more familiar climes of Charlottesville, Virginia, where he currently resides (Any slanderous rumors you’ve heard of Matt being run out of El Centro by an angry, torch-wielding mob are entirely untrue). He managed to squeeze a visit to Mary in Budapest between jobs, and the two rascals were able to make it to Bulgaria’s Black Sea coast before running out of patience with European train travel and, subsequently, each other.

Matt’s move east has put him much closer to Washington, D.C. And the greatest thing D.C. has to offer – besides a chance to witness the White House and Congress work together in perfect harmony for the greater good of the nation – is Mike, Virginia, and the spud herself, Anna. Hounddog turns two this February, and Mike has already taught her to say “Eers” when she spots the logo of the West Virginia University football squad. Virginia, obviously, is overjoyed.

Well, that concludes the 2007 edition of the M family holiday update! Such an exciting time to be alive, and so much to do in the next year. Will Mary subdue her wanderlust and finish college? Will lazy, listless Matt hold down a job longer than a few months? Will Delta Kap Valerie get asked to the big dance? Will the nation pull a stupid and elect Mitt Romney? Only time will tell. Until then, we can only wish you the merriest of Christmases, and a healthy, happy New Year.

here’s a good article that sums up why I think President Bush is a dirty, no-good sonofabitch.
and now, to quote liberally:

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oh. and oh, wait. there’s more.

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god, what an irresponsible piece of shit. and god, are the Democrats worthless. roll over and lie prone, all of you. only 11 more months until you’re voted out of office again.

edit: now with pictures!

I’m late because baseball is announcing to everyone that its players use steroids and HGH. surprise!
ooh, CNN is skipping the baseball bullshit.
hey, no Kucinich. this will be a lot less funny in his absence. 

“question: is it a priority to balance federal budget every year?”
Barack Obama: bullshit, bullshit, one or two years.
Bill Richardson: I am governor, so I have to do it every year. wants line-item veto authority to balance the budget. everyone has to sacrifice. if you want money, senator, then you have to put a note in Bill’s good idea box. he’ll leave it outside his office next to the lollipops.
Joe Biden: coughs. apologizes for coughing. talks about priorities. says military programs too costly. all of his education, health care and environment shit will be paid for by the hunk he’ll cut from defense.
Chris Dodd: he’s like a car salesman. numbers, numbers, grow the economy, end the war. fiscal discipline. must be flexible.
John Edwards: end structural deficiencies in the economy. strengthen middle class. corporate power and greed’s fault. only way to do all of this is to elect John Edwards.
Hillary Clinton: she’ll look at history (husband’s presidency) to save money.

“when are taxes increases necessary or appropriate? and what programs would you increase taxes for?”
Richardson: this is all the wealthy’s fault. the war is expensive. must be fiscally responsible to help comapanies of the future and education.
Edwards: tax policies established by and for wealthy and corporations. eliminate tax breaks. but if you elect John Edwards, he’ll fix it, and strengthen the middle class. it took him longer than 30 seconds to say all of this.
Clinton: talks about the 90s a little more. they were fiscally responsible back then.

moderator asks, “you all are campaigning on lots of new ideas, and you say a pullout from Iraq will take years. how you gonna get the money for your flying rocket cars?”
Biden: I’ll get out of Iraq in one year. and cut the defense budget.
Obama: “did you know that corporations bank on the Cayman islands? I’ll stop that and restore fairness to the tax codes and give money to hardworking Americans.” also, will bring leadership to the White House.

Richardson: “the Iraq war has drained our military.” what about the troops?
Dodd: boo hoo, middle class. what about the 37 million people below the poverty line? I’ll save them, too. Dodd’s been doing it for decads in the Senate.

“hey, yo. how would you change the economic relationship with China?”
Richardson: he’ll be tougher on them. uses examples. will also fix trade deficit. doesn’t say how, but I’m sure he’s got a plan … no, wait, the plan would be that he’d be stronger, and not let them “play around with currencies.”
Dodd: slave labor, currency manipulation, intellectual theft. “it’s obviously important not to get bellicose.” you aren’t going to win Iowa using words like “bellicose,” Senator.

“how do we change entitlements to the future if we’re going to keep promises we make today?”
Clinton: Medicare is vulnerable. HMOs, drugs too expensive. she’s got a healthcare reform plan, calls it a specific name. probably on her website somewhere.
Biden: entitlements will be necessary. HMOs get too much money. blah, blah.
Obama: he’ll save Medicare. to do this, he’d change the way business is done in Washington.
Richardson: 1/3 of healthcare budget goes to bureaucracy.

“free statement rodeo!”
Obama: evokes Dr. King. wants to level with the American people.
Edwards: says America is at stake in this election. is willing to fight in Washington for America. wants America to rise up with him, make country better than they leave it.

“some of our biggest trading partners have stacks of accusations of human rights abuses, how would you, you know, fix that?”
Biden: this is important. we need to be more accountable. human rights should be conditions of trade agreements.
Richardson: human rights is a fundamental, uh, human right. impose trade sanctions on human rights violators.
Dodd: me and Jimmy Carter care about human rights. we need to restore moral authority.
Edwards: “human rights should be central the way america engages with the rest of the world.” the Chinese are sending us dangerous toys.

moderator says, “should NAFTA be scrapped or changed?”
Clinton: changed. Iowans have lost their jobs! “we don’t want to be the trade-patsies of the world!”
Obama: he’d talk to the presidents of Mexico and Canada to get this shit worked out. but seriously, folks: we need to stand for human rights. Guantanamo is an embarrassment.
Dodd: I passed Darfur legislations in the Senate last night!

“free statements from Biden and Richardson, go!” 
Biden: I have leadership experience. also, he’d end the war. he quotes a church hymn, says its time for the American people to stand up. what an asshole.
Richardson: says the Iraq war is the most important, fundamental issue affecting our country. 38 troops died in November! the VA system is fucked! we need to fix this, because Iowa cares about it.

“how would you tackle clean energy, as it’s going to cost all sorts of money.
Biden: we need significant change.
Richardson: I was the energy secretary. it’s a shame about the energy bill that died in the Senate today.
Dodd: seriously, it’s like he’s a car salesman. understands people don’t like taxes, but he suggests a corporate carbon tax.
Clinton: this is important. she has a plan. but beyond that, we need to enlist the American people in a patriotic movement to fix the energy crisis. she will bring the country together and lift the country up to reach for the stars.
Obama: there will be immediate tax increases, but people will figure out that green technology is economically sound. but he’s not telling this to the Sierra Club, he’s going to Detroit and the automakers and told them how it was and how it’s going to be. Obama is a forward thinker.
Edwards: it’s the corporations’ fault. he’ll deal with this “moral crisis.” what about future generations? 

“how would you vote on Harkin’s agricultural reforms?”
Dodd: Iowans know how to farm, and he’s for that. doesn’t answer.
Obama: family farms are getting squeezed out of rural Iowa. he’d stop subsidies to corporate farms. he’d vote for it.
Biden: this system will break itself. Biden will fix the system before it breaks. yes, he’d vote for it.
Clinton: “workin’ like a trojan” was used. what the fuck does that mean? family farmers are becoming an endangered species. she’d save them.

“30 second statements from Clinton and Dodd.”
Clinton: she’ll work hard for change. will end the war, and will get affordable health care for everyone.
Dodd: he’s got a record of achieving, for 26 years. did you know that he was in the Senate? and the Peace Corps. “this isn’t about wealth or celebrities.” fuck you, Clinton and Obama.

“how will you make our schools the best in the world?”
Edwards: more pre-school. also, better nutrition. wants a “national teaching university.” like the Naval Academy, he says. “we need to radically change No Child Left Behind.”
Richardson: full-day kindergarten. scrap No Child Left Behind. rewrite high school curriculum. hire 100,000 math and science teachers. minimum salary for teachers? 40K. not bad, Richardson.

“follow up, Richardson. you’re from New Mexico, which is technically retarded, thanks to its poor education system. explain yourself.”
Richardson: we’re getting better. we have a lot of indians, so cut us some slack on No Child Left Behind.
Obama: we need to get parents re-engaged in instilling a sense of excellence in our children. blames TV and video games.
Dodd: education is the key to everything. we need leadership.
Clinton: has a “holistic” view of education. will bring classroom into the 21st century.
Edwards: says we need to create an infrastructure in America to create an innovative workforce.
moderator cuts Edwards off because she thought he was raising his hand when he wasn’t, and docks him extra time.
Biden: my wife is a teacher, so he knows about education. he can pay for education.

“in light of all of this we’ve been talking about, what could you realistically achieve in your first year as president?”
Obama: would task joint chiefs to start pullout of Iraq. would have AG review all of Bush’s decisions. would save healthcare.
Biden: would hand the joint chiefs “The Biden Plan.” would make it clear to the world that we’re abandoning the Bush policies of bad stuff. also, save children’s health insurance. also, would get pre-school education going. he’s got a plan on that, too.
Richardson: announce an “energy revolution.” pull out of Iraq in a year. would follow the constitution of the United States.
Dodd: makes fun on Richardson’s laundry list. then, he’d change the discourse of this country. it’s too mean! he’d give the constitution back to the American people. not just end the Iraq war, but engage in robust diplomacy. also, get some answers on health care.
Edwards: he can’t believe all of these laundry lists, either. he’d just attack global warming, reform health care and shut down Guantanamo, but none of this will happen unless Americans take back their country. starting in Iowa. by voting for John Edwards.
Clinton: she’d be very busy. she’d review every executive order from Bush. also, would end Bush’s War on Science. also, she wouldn’t wait about fixing the budget.

“hey Clinton. when you were 1st Lady, your healthcare reforms were described as ‘closed and secretive.’ would your presidency be like that?”
Clinton: no. she’s older and wiser. also, her administration would work with Congress, and crack down on lobbyists.

“Biden, are you a racist?”
Biden: I have experience. the reason he got involved in politics was because of the civil rights movement. minorities overwhelmingly vote for Biden in Delaware. everybody who knows Biden knows he’s committed to civil rights and civil liberties. ask anybody. everybody claps for him.
Obama: no, seriously, Biden isn’t a racist. “I will provide some testimony, as they say in church,” for Joe Biden.

“come on, Edwards, come on; how will you accomplish your agenda after calling everyone corrupt in Washington?”
Edwards: we have an epic battle in front of us. it’s not gonna be easy, America. but Edwards has been fighting corporations his entire life, and he’ll keep fighting, and we must win to do things we want to do for America.

“Dodd, after your dad was censured, are you running to restore the Dodd name?”
Dodd: I’m not embarrassed my dad. he worked in the New Deal. he’s motivated by continuing his dad’s good works.

“Richardson, remember Los Alamos? why should we elect you president when you fucked that up so badly as energy secretary?”
Richardson: yeah, he took a shit all over Wen Ho Lee. but he’ll stand behind his record as energy secretary.

“dear, sweet Obama. since you have no foreign policy experience and rely on so many Clinton advisors, why would you be any different than presidents of the past?”
Clinton cackles at him.
Obama: “I’m looking forward to [Clinton] advising me as well.” snap! would stop the politics of fear. long-term security comes from long-term prosperity around the world.

moderator asks, “how would you all address signing statements?”
Clinton: “we need to quit perversion of the constitution.” Bush is bad.
Edwards: “it doesn’t matter what George Bush thinks. he is not king.”

“everybody: New Year’s resolutions?”
Clinton: she has a multi-part resolution. spend time with family, exercise more, do a great job on her campaign. rebuild optimism and confidence of the American people.
Edwards: he’d remember that somewhere in America tonight a child will go to bed hungry. and people will beg in emergency rooms will beg for health care. and someone will lose their job.
Dodd: vote for me!
Richardson: lose some weight. he wishes (a wish, might I add, is not a resolution) that Congress and the White House will resolve their differences. he also wishes that everyone would stay optimistic.
Biden: he resolves to remember where he came from (which is Delaware). he’d remember what it was like when things were really bad.
Obama: he’d remind himself constantly that this is not about him. yesterday, he went and bought a Christmas tree with his girls. somehow, he’d make sure that all of this is worth it.

“what are the lessons from Iowa for the rest of the United States?”
Clinton: thank you, Iowa, it’s been extraordinary, and lots of good food.
Edwards: the Iowa caucus goers see us up close. which is why it’s important. also, Edwards is driven from his gut to help Americans of all shapes, shades and sizes.
Dodd: Iowans are smart. that’s a good thing for America.
Richardson: Iowans like underdogs (Richardson is an underdog). they don’t like the national media and “smartypants” telling you what’s what.
Biden: namedrops a couple of shithole Iowa towns. says that Iowans like him.
Obama: Iowa reflects the core decency of American people. Cat, who is sitting here, says Obama has a huge, “vaginal” mouth.

and, that’s it!

I wouldn’t call this ”liveblogging.” a lot of this is without commentary. obviously, this is all filtered through my eyes and ears, but you’re so very welcome; here’s the Tuesday GOP debate. 

says the moderator: “is the debt a threat to national security?”
Rudy Giuliani: no. Islamic terrorism.
Duncan Hunter: trade deficit. China.
Ron Paul: yes. “we’re in the midst of a currency crisis.”
Tom Tancredo: energy independence.”
Fred Thompson: (wakes up) “we’re bankrupting the next generation.” wants to save social security.
Mitt Romney: “this is not a time for us to wring our hands and think our future is bleak.” says we need good schools for kids, good health care, good policy in Washington. strengthen the American people, ah fuck. he said absolutely nothing.
Mike Huckabee: outsourcing sucks. need to “feed” ourselves.
John McCain: yes. it is a national security issue. “if oil reaches $100 a barrel … money will go to terrorists. he’ll make oil independence a Manhattan project.
holy shit, it’s Alan fucking Keyes: abolish the income tax. install fair tax.

moderator says, “what sacrifices would you ask the American people to make to lower the national debt? please be specific.”
Giuliani: strength of America is its people. give people more money to spend so we can have unlimited dreams. moderator asks him the question again, cause he didn’t answer it and he says: reduce income tax burden, let them buy their own health care.
Paul: “it’s absolutely unnecessary to sacrifice.” cut spending for defense overseas.
Huckabee: move from intervention-based helath care model to prevention-based.

“are there programs that are so important that you’d be willing to run a deficit to save them?”
Romney: that situation will not exist. let’s ask the private sector. let the programs that don’t work go.
Tancredo: “follow the constitution of this country.” “we do far too many things that excede our constitutional boundaries.” defense is foremost, everything is extraneous.
Thompson: yes. military. infrastructure. research and development.

moderator asks, “who in this country is paying more than a fair share of taxes: wealthy, middle class, poor, corporations?”
Keyes: incumbents.
McCain: reform tax code.
Huckabee: we need a fair tax. not to punish, but to enable.
Romney: he’s worried about the middle class. apparently, it keeps him up at night. he actually answered the question.
Thompson: I wish I was like Romney so I didn’t have to worry about taxes. (that’s paraphrased, but he actually said that.)
Tancredo: fair tax.
Paul: middle class.
Hunter: wants to … wait for it … flat tax, fair tax … nope. I thought he was going to propose abolishing the IRS.
Giuliani: reduce taxes across the board. get rid of death tax.

“free statement time, everyone!” said the Moderator, and then she takes off her shirt.
Mccain: I’ve been involved with every major national security issue in our time … I have the judgment and experience. wants to keep America safe.
Hunter: I stand for a strong national defense, blah blah.

“stop talking so long,” says the moderator. “one in five jobs is fucked. how can America compete? what’s the deal?”
Paul: non-answer.
Romney: understands private sector. invest in education and technology and foreign oil is bad and so is Chinese currency manipulation. no trade barriers.
Huckabee: can’t part the Red Sea, can part the Red Tape. small business. stop frivolous lawsuits.

“considering that poverty and abuse are often blamed for fostering terrorism, should we change policies with bad states?”
McCain: likes human rights and still wants to talk about trade.

“changes to NAFTA? specific, please.”
Giuliani: likes it. NAFTA a good thing. more NAFTA. embrace free trade and globalization.
Thompson: also is a fan of the NAFTA. Mexicans are assholes for talking shit about us and NAFTA. “I have nothing in particular to point out.” he doesn’t know what NAFTA is.
Tancredo: doesn’t like NAFTA. “if it worked so well … why do Mexicans all come up here because of it?” NAFTA impedes sovereignty.
Hunter: also doesn’t like the Mexicans. NAFTA a bad deal.

“free statement rodeo roundup!”
Paul: we need more liberty and freedom. constitution was supposed to constrain government, but it don’t! no, it restrains people!
Thompson: national security. this man was on “Law & Order.”

“how many of you believe global climtate change is a serious threat? show of hands.”
no one raises hands.
Thompson: won’t raise hand unless he can talk about it.
they almost turned on her, there.
McCain: it’s real. we can address it.
Giuliani: real. energy independence.

“what impact on economy would be acceptable to reduce global impact of climate change?”
Romney: energy independence helps everybody. but it’s called “global warming. not America warming.”
Keyes: he’s still talking about incumbents.
Thompson makes fun of him for it. everybody laughs at Keyes.

“Huckabee, what’s the deal with your mandate on biofuels and shit?”
Huckabee: “we don’t own this earth, we are simply stewards of it.” agrees with McCain. willing to make the decisions that won’t necessarily change the mandates. thank god.
Hunter: isn’t big on ethanol. loves the incentives for energy innovation.
Tancredo: doesn’t believe in mandates.

“free statement rodeo!”
Tancredo: immigration without assimilation becomes “a catastrophe.” quotes Roosevelt, says nation a “polyglot boarding house.”
Huckabee: gibberish about roots and Americans, and, fuck it. who cares?

“science literacy is down. what standards does U.S. need to adopt to improve education?”
McCain: more eduational competition. more charter schools and vouchers. more home schooling. (yeah, home schooling is a great way to improve science literacy.)
Giuliani: public schools suck. more private, parochial, home schooling.
Hunter: Jamie Escalante. “Stand and Deliver” was a good movie. Hunter then blames teachers unions indirectly.
Romney: pay teachers more. OK, I actually agree with that.
Huckabee: education is a state issue. someone should tell Alabama and West Virginia this. Huckabee says education is boring. “unleash weapons of mass instruction.” I swear to god, he said that. wants more music in schools.
Paul … no, wait, Keyes is bitching about television time. Keyes: wants god in schools. he demanded time so he can say “we need god in schools.” I’m so happy Keyes got on here. someone must have left the back door open.
back to Paul: Dept. of Education sucks. No Child Left Behind sucks. education sucks. everything sucks. give tax credits to teachers, but don’t pay them more. bureaucrats to blame.
Thompson: biggest obstacle is National Education Association. Thompson does not like the NEA. at. all. or their scare tactics. the NEA is the biggest obstacle to education in America.
Tancredo: I worked for Ronald Reagan. Huckabee doesn’t know what’s up. abolish the Dept. of Education. Tom Tancredo hates you, Margaret Spellings.
big Huck: fuck you all, I know more about executive experience than anyone here.
Romney: just wanted to point out that Huckabee comes from a stupid, poor state. unlike himself, who comes from smart, smart Massachusetts.

“1st year in office, what do you do?”
Giuliani: major tax reduction, end illegal immigration, reduce size of federal government, defeat islamic terrorism, move toward energy indepence. fuck, I’m voting for this guy!
Hunter: strengthen military. build border fence with Mexicans. bring back jobs from Chinese. slants!
Paul: end Iraq war. first time I’ve heard that fucking thing mentioned all night. no more pre-emptive war. stop threatening Iran. bring troops home.
Tancredo: would free someone I’ve never heard of. get rid of illegal immigrants. would continue Iraq “battle” and stop threat to Western Civilization.
Thompson: he’d use this time for some straight talk with the American People.
Romney: he’ do more than talk, no; he’d overwhelm global jihad, which he mispronounces. reduce tax burden, federal spending, get on track for energy independence, etc.
Huck: makes fun of everybody’s “laundry list.” he’d be a president of all of the United States. everybody’s fighting each other, so who’s gonna fight for America? Huckabee would. just think about it.
McCain: “listen to me, I’m qualified, you fuckers.” he’d take the fight to the land, sea, air, and cyberspace. also, he’d restore trust in government.
Keyes: would restore moral sovereignty. day one, Keyes is getting rid of abortion. drop tha bomb, Keyes! even more, he’d abolish the income tax. go on, player! then, he’d establish a national border guard and seal the United States. (note: I’m making fun of Keyes cause he’s black)

“Romney, Keyes, Giuliani, go!”
Romney: “I love Iowa and Iowans’ heartland values.” Romney knows a lot about stuff, and he’d be a good president, so please, vote for Romney.
Keyes: if you want to restore the credibility of the Republican party, vote for Alan Keyes, and don’t roll your eyes.
Giuliani: “America needs bold leadership.” I bet. mentions 12 commitments, some campaign bullshit.

break for television plug in, and, that’s all I got. I’m an hour in and I have shit to do.

in the summer of 2002, myself, Andrew and Kyle loaded a cooler full of Cokes and ice and a couple of lawn chairs and a frisbee. got in the car, and went to Grant Park. it was July 3rd. this is when the Taste of Chicago is going on. it’s a pretty big festival. lots of food, greasy food, pretty expensive.
we staked out some grass, a few sidewalks away from Lake Shore Drive. a good view of the harbor. and waited. we were early.
it was a long day. we drank all the Coke and played a lot of frisbee. ate a lot of food. 
by 9 p.m., the place was bumping. I bet there was a couple hundred thousands of people in Grant Park that night. and me, and Andrew and Kyle. Kyle doesn’t talk much.

and all of us, we watched the fireworks.

here’s a song I love: “going up the country” by Canned Heat. makes me want to start a jug band.

I got a problem. I’ve been reading my back logs, and I don’t like it. I don’t like my tone, I don’t like my character. I sound like a dick. so I must be one. all this self loathing and cynicism and whining, it gets kind of hollow after a while, and it doesn’t stand up over the long run. see, the thing is, I’m having a crisis of confidence. all. over. the place.

I can’t wait for vacation to begin (end of month). and then after that, I don’t know. I don’t know what I’m looking forward to after that. I don’t like my job an awful lot, I feel listless, and I don’t know why. I don’t know what I want. don’t know where to go. and I usually hold off from dropping this on here, so as to avoid all of you all’s derision, but it is what is, and what it is is I’m sad and lonely and nursing my wounds and that’s the truth. Matt is feeling sorry for himself in his apartment in Charlottesville. fuck you. but I’ll probably get over most of whatever this is tomorrow.
and also, hooray for Cat. you’re very nice and I enjoy your company and this sweater that I’m wearing is very warm.

see, that paragraph right there, the above one, I’ll hate it in a week.

onto something completely different; saw “no country for old men” yesterday, and it was boss. unsettlingly violent, wonderful acting, lots of symbolism so it’s worthy of seeing again. apparently, it’s based on a recent novel by a Cormac McCarthy, and he’s been fairly prolific over the past couple of decades but I’m not especially interested in reading that story of his. he also wrote a novel called “the road,” about a post-apocalyptic America full of cannibals. and it won the Pulitzer this year.
so yeah, I want to read it. if anyone who reads this has the kind of relationship with me that a christmas gift would be appropriate, then look no further: buy me the Pulitzer winner about American cannibals. an easy, obvious choice.